An Empirical Rabbit Hole
Fun with Existentialism!
Inspired by an ‘Audacious Woman’
My offering today is entirely based on some personal musings and reflections that I have been playing with in recent days. Ultimately, I was launched into putting my thoughts into words due to inspiration from Anne Boyd Rioux’s post yesterday on ‘Audacious Women, Creative Lives,’ entitled, ‘Am I Too Old to Change My Life?’ I’ve linked it below because it is truly lovely and thought-provoking:
My Response
In response to Anne’s fantastically engaging post, I commented as follows:
I need a multi-heart button. ♥️♥️♥️♥️
These last few pieces of yours are hitting me right at the core of where I am existing at this moment. I am 52. I respectfully disagree with those who say that it is not about reinventing ourselves. I feel like Anne’s point, which resonates so deeply with me, is that we may feel that we are unable to alter our path, career, trajectory, goals because those are not aligned with the essence of who we ARE. With that existential and foundational belief in place, we must somehow alter, reinvent, who we ARE, or who we believe ourselves to be, BEFORE we can move forward with a new sense of purpose or direction. At least that’s how I see it and it’s certainly how I FEEL this deep longing that I am experiencing presently. It’s why I find myself frequently saying and writing and thinking, “I am a writer.” If that is who and what I am, then that is who and what I will be.
It Happened Again
It seems to happen more and more often that when I plunge myself down a rabbit hole of thought about one topic or another, that sweet bunny just throws back all sorts of yummy tidbits to satiate my curiosity and then he sends a flaming carrot onto my desire to learn more.
No sooner had I submitted my comment to Anne’s post and settled back into the delicious book I was reading that I was struck with the realization that the words in front of my eyes were also existential in thought. And yes, I acknowledge that when we are thinking along a certain line, then we are more likely to notice commonalities where we may have missed them otherwise. But still.
And of course, it did not hurt one bit that the book I was reading was Beth Kempton’s ‘Kokoro,’ which is a deeply emotional and graceful gift in itself. Here’s what I stumbled upon:
We are time. We are happenings. We are fleeting sounds in the grand opera of the universe. Our lives are not only a collection of occurrences, where we collide with others in space and time; we too are events. Yet again we are reminded of mujyo, impermanence.
(Kempton, 2024, Kokoro, p.144, Piatkus)
The Third
In order to consider myself fully bowled over by my Existential learning experience of the day, there had to be three pieces. The third came as I took a break from reading to peruse social media while I had a snack. And there, of course, I encountered number three from one of my top preferred Coaching sites.
Connection to Coaching
The International Coaching Federation was sharing information about Existential Coaching, which admittedly I had never heard of prior to this day, on their LinkedIn page. I found the information enormously exciting because it aligned so well with the way I see my work of helping others.
For me to process the information fully, I need to break it into bite-sized chunks and restructure it into a tidy little visual that is easily digestible. This is what I do with students and clients, and I find it incredibly helpful for me as well. In my mind, it looks something like this:
Identify Your Values + Identify Your Beliefs + Define Your Purpose
Align Actions to:
Values
Beliefs
Purpose
When our decisions and actions are
aligned with our values, beliefs, and
purpose, we experience less anxiety
& stress in our daily lives.
Though I consider much of the Existential Coaching information similar to what Coaches like myself generally believe and provide through their services, I find the approach and the dimensional details certainly worthy of further consideration and exploration. Below is the information that the ICF shared along with a link to a cornucopia of resources if you would like to take your own rabbit hole trip:
Rooted in existential philosophy, this coaching method embraces four dimensions:
💪The Physical
🪷 The Spiritual
👤The Personal
🫂The Social
This type of coaching can guide you to existential well-being by creating meaning and fostering resilience and purpose in a future shaped by collective trauma, demographic shifts, and rapidly evolving AI.
ICF Information on Existential Coaching
Fun with Existentialism!
Yes, I’m being a bit silly with this subtitle, especially for those of us who cringe at the mere memory of university philosophy classes, BUT it is hard to think of many topics more appropriate for self-reflection or journaling than Existentialism! Don’t you think?
Now, graduate level philosophy prompts may be perfectly aligned with our adult goals and aspirations, but I think it would be fun to gently explore the dimensions with younger learners as well. In writing especially, I believe that we should never assume what our students may or may not be able to learn or do, so here are some ideas I’m looking forward to using in the classroom as well as in Coaching sessions:
Physical Dimension: how the physical body relates with the material world
PROMPT: Describe a place that feels completely comfortable to you. Use all 5 senses to describe this space. Why are you most at ease in this environment?
Spiritual Dimension: connecting with a purpose greater than yourself
PROMPT: What strength, talent, or skill do you possess that helps others live better lives? Describe how your gift to others makes our world a better place.
Personal: knowing your individual identity, values, and beliefs
PROMPT: Recreate the diagram I provided above to illustrate your own identity, values, and beliefs. Remember to include at least 2 actions that you will take that are aligned with your personal identity, values, and beliefs.
OR
PROMPT: Create a T-Chart and label the columns RIGHT and WRONG. Use your own values and beliefs to guide you as you list at least 5 actions in each column. Be prepared to share which value or belief led you to place each action in its appropriate column.
Social: your relationship with others and within society
PROMPT: How do you take care of people in your life who are close to you? Is this different from how you care for people who are not close to you? Should there be a difference?
Dear Reader
I continue to be endlessly impressed with the intelligence, talent, and kindness of the Substack community. I would love to hear your thoughts on my connections here and if it sparked any musings of your own.
Be well,
Nicole
*For my Coaching site, please visit Authentic Clarity Coaching with Nicole.
*Instagram: nicole_ac_coaching
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