I am a Life Coach

and it's not nearly as 'Woo Woo' as some may think

No ‘Woo Woo’ Here

I stumbled upon a piece of writing the other day where the author was mildly bashing the abundance of life coaches that have emerged in recent years. I bristled only slightly as I educated myself on the individual’s opinion because of course everyone is entitled to their own mind.

Then I remembered that even I had once wondered aloud, “What is a life coach?” and why would anyone need a coach for living?

I had been coaching students and colleagues as an educator for many years throughout my career when I confidently thought, “Well, I’m already a coach, so I’ll take this training and just add it to my credentials since I already know everything there is to know about it.”

After the first 60+ hours of training, I realized how very un-schooled (both literally and figuratively) I had been about the craft of Life Coaching and I released any ‘Woo Woo’ notions that I had previously held in common with the aforementioned basher of coaching.

Coaching is serious work. It is important work. And it is incredibly fascinating, exciting, and soul-filling. To be truly present for a single individual by serving as the best listener they have ever encountered, is an honor and a privilege. To encapsulate their deepest concerns and most challenging struggles into a manageable, underwhelming plan of attack, is like restacking a tower of strewn dominoes but only using the double-dotted ones this time as they are the most worthy of being played again.

To complete a session with an easy breathing client, who is smiling as they finish jotting down their ‘next steps’ list, by asking if they feel that they have accomplished their goal for our time together, is satisfaction supreme. And ending the call knowing deep in my soul that I have helped another human being find clarity and direction when they felt they had none, brings me great joy as it perfectly suits my own value of living a life of peace and purpose.

Substack Community

I love Substack for the space it provides me to write about life and the things that matter deeply to me. I also love the warm sense of community, intellectualism, kindness, and support that I feel whenever I logon to these fabulous pages. In the spirit of community and support, I am sharing below the “About Your Coach” page from my Coaching website for those who have asked about my practice, for fellow Coaches, and for anyone else who may be curious about why I am so powerfully drawn to serve in this capacity.

I'm pretty sure that I was born a "helper." I was always the teacher, the tutor, the teacher's pet, the good girl. I was also painfully shy and self-conscious and insecure.  Recognizing these same traits in others became my super-power early in life.  I think I discovered long ago that if I helped others survive their struggles, then my own didn't feel quite so heavy.

​​I grew up in a home where addiction and mental health concerns added spice to family dynamics.  I ran away to college as fast as I possibly could following graduation; I was in such a rush to grow up, to escape. I planned to be a writer and a child psychologist, but within the first year of college I had become an Early Childhood Education major.  Still a helper, but faster to the adult world of work as an education major.  ​

Following college, I dabbled in a string of jobs that taught me so much about people and the world we live in.  I was a waitress, a substitute teacher, a dental receptionist, a Jenny Craig counselor, a drug and alcohol rehab dictaphone transcriber, a legal secretary, a bartender, and finally a training coordinator for the federal government.  ​

Eventually, I left the government job to return to teaching.  I taught 33 kids from El Salvador in a multi-age K-3 classroom near DC for a year, then first grade, fourth grade, second grade and third grade in my home town in Maryland. After ten years back in the classroom, I thought I could help more people by leading the school so I became an Assistant Principal for 9 years, a Principal for 3, and finally a central office English Language Arts administrator for 3 more that bled into the COVID years. That last stint just about broke me. Cubicle work is not for the teacher-at-heart. 

Craving a deeper purpose and human connection, the following year I became a middle school special educator.  As I write this, I've been helping every kid I possibly can whether they are special education kids or just special kids for the last 3 years.  I've now been an educator, in one form or another, for over 26 years. The original passion I had for teaching remains strong, but it has certainly been tested over the years.  

What I have omitted from this little life story are the events that transpired while I was teaching or leading for all those years. My daughter and I lost her father when she was 12 years old.  He was 36.  She struggles with the loss of him to this day. I struggle with her struggle as well as my own. My father and my younger brother passed away a decade later. The loss of those we love is heavy, complicated, and life-altering. But those we love are never truly lost.  

I share this auto-biographical information in order to be transparent. Authentic. Our stories make us who we are. My story is why I continue to be the helper I was as a child.  The difference is that now, as an adult, I also have the life experiences that enable me to empathize with the heartaches and challenges that so many of us carry today.  

This is my story, albeit an abbreviated one, and as a Coach I will not share it during sessions, because that time is wholly yours.  But, if you are a sister, a daughter, a brother, a father, a mother, a teacher, a leader, a musician, a dependent, a co-dependent, a friend, a partner, or any other human being in need of support, just know that I am here to listen without judgment or shame and I am always ready to help.

​Be well,

Nicole